I hate sleeping (Part 2?)

I thought maybe I should update on the little situation. There’s been some time between then and now.

Still tired, obviously. I can barely keep my eyes open past my 2nd hour class. I promise it’s not cause I’m bored, but this whole not being able to sleep thing is killing me. The tapping is driving me insane now. I have laid awake, silently begging for everything to go silent. Again, with the thing that lurks on my bed. I could tell myself it’s just a cat, but I don’t even own a cat. I wasn’t bothered about it before, really. It was kinda funny at first. I’m not one to spook easily.

I’m worried that I shouldn’t have been so nonchalant in the first place. I don’t take that stupid paranormal stuff seriously anyway, and I always struggled with sleeping. Insomnia has been my worst enemy since I was a kid, and I thought it was just some crazy hallucinations, or some form of sleep paralysis.

I think it’s making me erratic. I flinch at everything now, and that wasn’t exactly something I did frequently. I come home, and I feel like I’m being watched the second I close the door. But that’s such a silly thing, I know. It’s cheesy. You’d hear it in some dumb horror movie. I can even imagine one of those classic “dumb girl” characters saying it in my head.

I wish I was kidding, though.

I can write it off and say it’s just from college stress, daydreaming too hard, and endless bouts of nightmares that seem to come to me more often than sleep. How do I just tell myself this isn’t real? That I don’t feel like a hostage in my own home? Or, that my own house has turned into a fish bowl, where I’m the fish and something lurking in the dark is my owner?

That’s weird to say, but I feel like a damn toy.

I feel like I’m just going crazy, but I’m getting tired finally.

I’m gonna go to bed, and see how this turns out.